Outlandia.... is that like the Forgotten Realms?

[wolf]

I thought Forgotten Realms was a series of books. I don't play D&D.

[Oldrac the Chitinous]

I'm not afraid.
I've got mad hit points, yo.

[Cirtur]

Don't care. I'm a mod and currently we are post count twins.

[LordRetard]

Just as well, because there is no way you would be able to take on a Tarrasque, even in D&D3e/3.5e.

pfft bullshit I can bypass his epic damage reduction my vorpal greatsword has a +5 attack bonus

(as per epic level handbook)

[mountainmage]

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!

You defeat the Tarrasque.

[LordRetard]

That was easy, I wish my GM were so easy-going. He actively tries to kill us, and it's only through his action (and our tendency to lie about our dice rolls) that we survive.

[Edminster]

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!

You defeat the Tarrasque.

If only it could be insta-killed. Alas, it cannot because of Regeneration.

::edit::
Also you would need to roll two nat 20sin a row to behead something anyway.

[LordRetard]

You'd need to cast a wish or miracle after "killing" it, according to the 3.5E Monster Manual. The problem here is that a vorpal critical is a death attack, so it should deal the Tarrasque's HP+10 in nonlethal damage, but the thing is that the tarrasque can't be killed by death attacks so would it keep its head, and deal no damage? Then again the tarrasque would just regenerate its head in 1d6 minutes. Is the vorpal critical ineffective on creatures that are immune to death effects? I guess it's a special case because only the tarrasque has such powerful regeneration. If you get a chance to look at the Epic Level Handbook 3E check out the Hecatoncheires, it gets 100 greatsword attacks at +71 attack and +20 damage in a round and is CR 57.

oh god I am so alone

[littleninja]

You'd need to cast a wish or miracle after "killing" it, according to the 3.5E Monster Manual. The problem here is that a vorpal critical is a death attack, so it should deal the Tarrasque's HP+10 in nonlethal damage, but the thing is that the tarrasque can't be killed by death attacks so would it keep its head, and deal no damage? Then again the tarrasque would just regenerate its head in 1d6 minutes. Is the vorpal critical ineffective on creatures that are immune to death effects? I guess it's a special case because only the tarrasque has such powerful regeneration. If you get a chance to look at the Epic Level Handbook 3E check out the Hecatoncheires, it gets 100 greatsword attacks at +71 attack and +20 damage in a round and is CR 57.

oh god I am so alone

oh my god. That was so nerdy. That was nerdier than me and all my nerdy buddies. That was nerdier than nerd night.

*points and laughs*

[Oldrac the Chitinous]

That's a lot of dice to roll, is what that is.

Also, yes, it was nerdier than most things.

[Edminster]

You'd need to cast a wish or miracle after "killing" it, according to the 3.5E Monster Manual. The problem here is that a vorpal critical is a death attack, so it should deal the Tarrasque's HP+10 in nonlethal damage, but the thing is that the tarrasque can't be killed by death attacks so would it keep its head, and deal no damage? Then again the tarrasque would just regenerate its head in 1d6 minutes. Is the vorpal critical ineffective on creatures that are immune to death effects? I guess it's a special case because only the tarrasque has such powerful regeneration. If you get a chance to look at the Epic Level Handbook 3E check out the Hecatoncheires, it gets 100 greatsword attacks at +71 attack and +20 damage in a round and is CR 57.

oh god I am so alone

To be fair, by the time the PCs are ready to fight that they are at least Gods (or something similarly powerful).

[LordRetard]

I forget what the CR is for the avatars of Gods, which is what you'd normally be using. I've seen them in some books and they are heavy.

Quick calculations for the highest-level spell in the Epic Level Handbook, the level 419 "Vengeful Gaze of God"; you'd need a score of about 850 in one ability. Since the highest you could feasibly start with is 20, that's about 3000 levels unless you use permanent modifications or magic items (probably). Also it's not very good.

oh my god. That was so nerdy. That was nerdier than me and all my nerdy buddies. That was nerdier than nerd night.

*points and laughs*

Yeah, but I'm PRETTY TOUGH FOR A NERD.

[littleninja]

Yeah, but I'm PRETTY TOUGH FOR A NERD.

Yeah, does your dad keep a home gym in the basement?

[mountainmage]

BA-zing! Good one, ninja.

[LordRetard]

Wait... How did YOU know I live in my dad's basement!?