Rap Battle vs Steffles

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Jesster
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Rap Battle vs Steffles

Post by Jesster »

I COME FROM THE WEST SIDE OF TOWN
NOT THE EAST
OR THE SOUTH
BUT THE WEST
BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE THE BIG BALLAS ROLL
AND THEY ROLL HARD
AND IN BARRELS
OIL BARRELS
LIKE THE KIND THEY SHIP PETROLEUM IN
PETROLEUM TO MAKE THINGS
LIKE PENS, CARS AND GASOLINE
IF YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND INFLATION,
HERE'S A CHART
Image


I'M COMING AT YOU HARDER THAN ICE
BUT NOT AS HARD AS DIAMONDS
OR TITANIUM
MORE LIKE A COMPOSITE ALLOY
OF STEEL, TIN, MAGNESIUM AND MAYBE IRON ORE
I'M GIVING YOU THIRD DEGREE BURNS
JUST LIKE COAL
WELL, NOT REALLY
BUT YOU GET THE IDEA

Booya!
"Moloch was drawn from memory, and is aware how crappy his face looks."

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Steffles
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Post by Steffles »

You came at me with a lame rap,
So here I come to rap right back.
You got mad at me cause your comics stink,
I could crush you faster than you think.
I wouldn't expect you to understand,
This knowledge is great, like the back of my hand.
I'm known as Steffles, fear my mammaries.
Your known as Jesster, giver of calamities.


BOO YAH!!
I no longer willingly date hawhaw.

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we_are_138
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Post by we_are_138 »

Steffles wrote:You came at me with a lame rap,
So here I come to rap right back.
You got mad at me cause your comics stink,
I could crush you faster than you think.
I wouldn't expect you to understand,
This knowledge is great, like the back of my hand.
I'm known as Steffles, fear my mammaries.
Your known as Jesster, giver of calamities.


BOO YAH!!
Ha that was actually pretty good.
"Is the multitude of laughters mine alone?"

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GreenCrayon
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Post by GreenCrayon »

we_are_138 wrote:Ha that was actually pretty good.
Jesster has to respond now, or he'll run the risk of being puh-owned.

(I'm enjoying watching this one unravel.)
Pirate.

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Jesster
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Post by Jesster »

Oh, you think you got you some mad skillz,
I think my friend HawHaw's been slippin' you pills.
You try to tell me my comics are lame?
I think you gotta pay yo friends to beat me at that game.
My name's the Jesster, but I ain't no fool,
The way I be rappin', I take you to school.
You call yourself Steffles, you think you attract?
I know your name's Tucker, and that's just a fact!

Boo-Ya, bizatch!
"Moloch was drawn from memory, and is aware how crappy his face looks."

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we_are_138
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Post by we_are_138 »

Im suddenly reminded of Josh Tobins gangster days.

I'm a gangster, I'm a straight up G,
The gangster life, is the life for me,
Shooting people by day, selling drugs by night,
Being a gangster is hella tight,
I walk around town, with a stark erection,
Then gave your mom a yeast infection,
I saw the policeman, and punched him in the eye,
To serve and protect, what a lie!?
I also don't like white people, you shouldnt too,
And don't get me started about the Jews,

I'm a gangster, grrrrrr... I'm mad....
I'm a gangster, my ryhmes are bad,
I'm a gangster, I'm iced out like a freezer,
I'm a gangster, I don't listen to Weezer,

I dropped out of school at the age of three(why?)
'Cause all the teachers tried to player hate on me (oh)
My rhymes are cool, just like doing cocaine,
My rhymes are hot, like a burning flame,
Sisqo is my homie, Hes a gangster too,
Me and Sisqo are the leaders of the gangster crew
I like to be in jail, and he likes to sing and dance,
Some say we're the perfect match,

I'm giving a shot out to my homies in cell block 8,
Being in jail sucks because you always have to masturbate,
'cept when a Jewish person goes to jail, all my homies cheer,
They will make mince meat out of his rear.
Van Petty helped me make the gangster beat to theis song,
I shot him in the face, 'cause he looked at me wrong,
"Is the multitude of laughters mine alone?"

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GreenCrayon
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Post by GreenCrayon »

Jesster wrote:I know your name's Tucker, and that's just a fact!
Although this one rhymed, I liked the first one better. It took itself less seriously. I can't help but love that.

And now, we await Steffles' reply...
Pirate.

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Jesster
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Post by Jesster »

I can't be so ridiculously unserious all the time. I had to prove I can rhyme and outbattle Steffles. Back to the unseriousness if she responds.
"Moloch was drawn from memory, and is aware how crappy his face looks."

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Crusty
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Post by Crusty »

I think someone should lay down a phat beat. UNSSST UNSSST UNSSST UNSSST ONN TAKKA TAKKA TAKKA OOOON TAKKA WIKKA TIKKA
I am the Illegitemate Father of Genetics
mountainmage wrote: anchorman was good, but you really need to see "The Grammar Police vs. Shut The Hell Up"

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GreenCrayon
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Post by GreenCrayon »

Crusty wrote:UNSSST UNSSST UNSSST UNSSST ONN TAKKA TAKKA TAKKA OOOON TAKKA WIKKA TIKKA
Is there a reason your phat beat sounds like a 70s porn movie soundtrack?
Pirate.

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Jesster
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Post by Jesster »

Because it's a 50 cent porn movie.
"Moloch was drawn from memory, and is aware how crappy his face looks."

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Steffles
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Post by Steffles »

Hey this time you kinda make sence,
but where, my foe, is your defence?
I guess your mom got you hooked on phonics,
So study up little gurl, on your harmonics.
You are distracted by your rays of stupid,
Too bad you were rejected a love from cupid.
Maybe he has been slippin some X,
At least I dont have to take advantage of pets.
Hawhaw is my man, i see your jealousy.
and Im not tucker, so dont accuse me.
Tucker is beat down, I just got started,
Your about to be beat down, so dont be hardhearted.
I dont pay my friends, your just not funny,
Your game is low and your rhymes are runny,
next time you come around, tryin to speak game on my turf,
Try again bitch cause you just got served.



OHHHH!!
I no longer willingly date hawhaw.

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GreenCrayon
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Post by GreenCrayon »

Steffles wrote:Try again bitch cause you just got served.
Hmmm, it's getting ugly. Someone's definitely going to end up getting served.

But Jesster has promised himself an unserious position in the next round.

And I seem to have taken it upon myself to commentate.
Pirate.

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we_are_138
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Post by we_are_138 »

GreenCrayon wrote: And I seem to have taken it upon myself to commentate.
I imagine it as a sort of nature program here in the states, we usually have Brits commentate cause they sound smart.
"Is the multitude of laughters mine alone?"

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GreenCrayon
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Post by GreenCrayon »

we_are_138 wrote:we usually have Brits commentate cause they sound smart.
And you always know they'll turn out to be the villain.

Dun dun DUN.
Pirate.

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