a modest proposal.

epoch · Post by **epoch** » Mon May 01, 2006 7:27 pm

tweekers.

for those of you unaware. a tweeker is a person who uses copious amounts of Meth.

they are usually ill-mannered, foul tempered, and prone to criminal acts.

my proposal is both an entertaining past-time and a public service.

skeet shooting for tweekers.

this game is played in two person teams.

player 1 has the rifle.
player 2 has a slingshot (or catapult)
and a bag full of little baggies of rocksalt(or other meth substitute)

step 1: find a fairly open urban area where tweekers are known to frequent. consult your local paper for details.

step 2: set up in a place that affords you a clear view of the area.

step 3: have player 2 shoot a baggie out into the area.

step 4: when a tweeker runs to pick up the baggy, player 1 must take aim and fire, killing the tweeker.

step 5: lather, rinse, repeat

25 points for a headshot
20 points for a 1 shot kill
-5 points for every shot it takes to kill the tweeker.

ruotwocone · Post by **ruotwocone** » Mon May 01, 2006 7:49 pm

you do know that skeet shooting isn't skeet shooting without a shotgun right? pffff... rifle, they're so clean.

epoch · Post by **epoch** » Mon May 01, 2006 7:50 pm

yeah I know. you really do need a shotgun.

but the rifle has more range. and the way I'm gonna set this up. I'll probably be on a roof of somekind.

so rifle it is.

TwoBuy · Post by **TwoBuy** » Mon May 01, 2006 7:59 pm

I don't see how them being tweaked will make the game more fun if it's long range. I think you need to just get them totally tweaked out then put them in a grass field and tell them you're gunna shoot 'em. I'll bet those lil' bastards are damn near impossible to hit.

epoch · Post by **epoch** » Mon May 01, 2006 8:04 pm

ok. fine...it's not so much skeet shooting as it is like a real life game of duck hunt.

happy now?

TwoBuy · Post by **TwoBuy** » Mon May 01, 2006 9:08 pm

epoch wrote:ok. fine...it's not so much skeet shooting as it is like a real life game of duck hunt.

happy now?

Nope. Cause duck-hunt they also move around all tweaky. You're talking about shooting druggies running toward a known spot (the baggie). Also, duck hunt had a skeet shooting mode

I'm gunna maintain that for the game to be fun, the tweakers will have to know they're being shot at.

epoch · Post by **epoch** » Mon May 01, 2006 9:31 pm

I'm gonna maintain that you're wrong...because...you're wrong.

I live in the tweeker capital of the world...and well all my friends agree with my plan...we're gonna be on the news! and jail shortly thereafter...

mountainmage · Post by **mountainmage** » Tue May 02, 2006 12:59 am

only if i can eat them afterwards. mmmm...dead bodies' blood + meth=red bull

TwoBuy · Post by **TwoBuy** » Tue May 02, 2006 1:43 am

mountainmage wrote:only if i can eat them afterwards. mmmm...dead bodies' blood + meth=red bull

I know it's New Yorkso they're probably all murderer's but I'm sure some of them stick to hash and alchohol.

Simon. · Post by **Simon.** » Tue May 02, 2006 2:31 pm

You know, this reminds me of a game we have here in Australia, I call it: Yoghurt puncher.

How you play the game, is you get a Goanna (Some people prefer Frill neck lizards, but I'm a Goanna man myself), and you drive it along the road very slowly, see, and when someone goes to overtake you, you throw a bucketfull of liquid heroin in their car and then, in the confusion, ram the off the road, into oncoming traffic. This can be a problem if they're in a stable vehicle like a Bobtail. But when you see an Echidna on the road, get that bucket ready, because boy are you in for a lot of fun.

epoch · Post by **epoch** » Tue May 02, 2006 4:02 pm

I want a bucket of liquid heroin!

TwoBuy · Post by **TwoBuy** » Tue May 02, 2006 4:31 pm

Simon. wrote:You know, this reminds me of a game we have here in Australia, I call it: Yoghurt puncher.

I am so moving to Australia. And not that crappy east australia either. (note it doesn't even deserve capitalization)

ruotwocone · Post by **ruotwocone** » Tue May 02, 2006 5:06 pm

Simon. wrote:You know, this reminds me of a game we have here in Australia, I call it: Yoghurt puncher.

How you play the game, is you get a Goanna (Some people prefer Frill neck lizards, but I'm a Goanna man myself), and you drive it along the road very slowly, see, and when someone goes to overtake you, you throw a bucketfull of liquid heroin in their car and then, in the confusion, ram the off the road, into oncoming traffic. This can be a problem if they're in a stable vehicle like a Bobtail. But when you see an Echidna on the road, get that bucket ready, because boy are you in for a lot of fun.

best simon. post ever. i kept reading this thing and all i could make sense of was something like "koala kangaroo dingo... bucketfull of liquid heroin in their car... echidna paul hogan" it's like a foreign language.