One Big Happy Family

[LordRetard]

It's cool. I don't really mind.

[Kimra]

Man, most families do. Some reason or another will drive a family member to not show up because of some spat or another, and the length of excommunication depends on how obstinate the person/family is.

Ah damn, this doesn't bode well for my family since they are the most stubborn of all people I have ever met. And it sucks extra bad because it's my mum being scapegoated. Joy for family!

Since dark alleys don't have doors, Spam-bots are the annoying cousin always asking for money for "the best new scheme" when you know their not going to pay you back.

[Lethal Interjection]

Man, most families do. Some reason or another will drive a family member to not show up because of some spat or another, and the length of excommunication depends on how obstinate the person/family is.

Ah damn, this doesn't bode well for my family since they are the most stubborn of all people I have ever met. And it sucks extra bad because it's my mum being scapegoated. Joy for family!

Since dark alleys don't have doors, Spam-bots are the annoying cousin always asking for money for "the best new scheme" when you know their not going to pay you back.

My family (my dad's side) are definitely stubborn, but in a different way than all of this. The family seems to rejoice in getting together and showing off to one another, differences be damned. That and half of the family is from Ottawa. I don't know if LR has had this experience, but there is just something about people from Ottawa.*

My mom's side is a complete mess, though it has gotten better, marginally. 7 kids, 3 from my blood grandmother (who died when my mom was young), another who was still an infant when she died (so didn't know grandmother #1), and another 3 from grandmother #2 (my grandfather remarried in under a year). So there are rifts and a lot of resentment, and family gatherings were very trying, especially on my mom. I've not been to many family gatherings because of this, and haven't seen more than half of the family (including my grandparents) in over 5 years, though my parents see some of them fairly regularly. Granted 3 of the siblings live in Winnipeg and Saskatchewan.

*Ottawa is the capital of Canadia. The something is that from the sample of people I have known from Ottawa I would say that over 95% of the sampling would show elitism to some degree.** I don't know why. Whether it is because they are from the capital, or because Ottawa was the Silicon Valley of Canadia, I don't know. Even my one set of cousins were great, but they moved out there pre-high school, and definitely adopted the same mindset.
** The sampling is from over 20 people, family and not. My one aunt and uncle aren't bad, but their kids are. The moved family is bad except the two that didn't move that way (they were in university or nearly married). I've had a dozen friends (varying degrees of closeness) only one of which doesn't exhibit this too badly. So that is 3 people who do not exhibit abundant elitism.

[smiley_cow]

Man, most families do. Some reason or another will drive a family member to not show up because of some spat or another, and the length of excommunication depends on how obstinate the person/family is.

This is currently my dad. He left my Mom whom everybody adored, for a woman he used to date in high school that they all just hate. They've actually gone so far as to cancel family functions, just so they don't have to deal with him (or her).

[Kimra]

Funny thing is before this year my family always got together for gatherings. Really close family. Big christmas parties with all the extended cousins aunties and uncles etc. Then this year they just decided that my mum was the devil incarnate, and bam, thank you very much, no more family. Yay?

[Euclidthegreek]

I want to be the retarded child you keep locked in the attic in fear that everyone will realise I exist.

But you're the perfect crazy-cat-lady aunt!

I think I would be the slightly senile old Grandfather who hates young people and usually has no idea what is going on but has some acquired wisdom which he shares with his descendants at inopportune moments. Unless of course anyone has a better idea.

Yes, but there is no cure for the dysfunctional family. Or so the ad below tells me. I don't know what the ad is for, nor do I care. I just believe everything it says.
And Euclid, if you are the senile grandfather, you have to squeeze everyone's ass inappropriately, relative or not.

Yay!

What role should Rainbow have? Should she be the teenage daughter or the creepy uncle who think's he's young (and works for the FBI).

[LordRetard]

Rainbow is the fat chronically nude uncle who spends all of his time cybering with teenage boys.

[Cirtur]

Who then turns to the rest of the family and shouts that he's really a girl.

[mountainmage]

Have you guys tried having a small, dying-out family? You barely get the chance to hate anybody when there's so few people!

(We do have a black sheep though. It's cool because I get to use the phrase black sheep.)

[Cirtur]

Mage, you need to marry a nice girl and have loads of sons.

[Sahan]

It's funny, because if we are discussing physical appearances I think I would be the black sheep in a herd of a very bizzare and experimental breed.

[Cirtur]

So you're a little strange in a field full of very odd sheep?

[Sahan]

No, I meant literally in terms of skin colour.

[mountainmage]

Mage, you need to marry a nice girl and have loads of sons.

I'm thinking one, maybe two tops. Assuming of course I ever find someone who'll marry me.

[Cirtur]

Okay, but if you have two then that means the family is getting bigger.