SMBC Comics Forum

I have a nameless fish! I have neglected to name him or her for two years on the assumption that he or she would die, but the time has come to jinx his or her life by naming him or her. I want a pun. I was thinking My Insecurity or My Frankenstein so I can feed My Insecurity or feed My Frankenstein, but I think I can find something even better. What are your suggestions, fine SMBC readers?

I'm not a terribly punny guy. Name him Phydeaux.

Name him "The Monkey" so's you can feed the monkey.

If you're a jerk you can call him Ghoti.

What kind of fish do you have?
I named my roommate's fish Professor Goldfish, but that might not be applicable to your situation.

I named my friends fish Touchy and Feely. I release these names under GNU License so that YOU TOO can use them at home.

I'd suggest The troll. The rule is: Please don't feed the troll.

Actually, how 'bout Methuselah? That seems oddly appropriate.

I like the insecurity one. Clever.

Do you get asked the question "How is..." a lot? Like a particular question that continues to get asked, maybe in regards to your job? Like if you were a web designer and your boss comes by and asks "How is the site coming along?", then you could name your fish "The Site" and answer your boss correctly.

Personally, I'd just name it Zach.*

*I'd be more inclined to use the big grin happy face here if it was animated with the tooth sparkle.

Call him cat.

Call him an ambulance.

Call him or her "the fruit of my loins" because that will be a fun thing to say to the people that come to your parties that you have and when they are eating some snacks, probably totino's pizza rolls because those are good snacks for parties, you can say "Oh hey guys I need to go feed the fruit of my loins" and they will all giggle appreciatively because you made a pretty nice joke and then they remember that you don't have a child because you are impotent/barren from the incident that happened 12 years ago and they will give you a look and you will be like :[] and then you will feed your fish and everyone will be like and you will explain to the people who aren't that your fish is named "the fruit of my loins" and they will too but they don't really mean it because they didn't find it that funny but you just ignore them and keep going on with your party.

Remember to have sex with the fish!

Oh yeah that too.

I hope your stepson doesn't eat the fish.