SMBCyclopedia

Symposium Mandated Bibliognostic 'Cyclopedia
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Edminster
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SMBCyclopedia

Post by Edminster »

Hello and Welcome to the Symposium of Weiner Studies! I am your Host and Master of Ceremonies, Edminster. I called you here because I need your help. All of you, collectively and singly. You see, the Symposium wants a definitive encyclopedia about one of the lesser-known branches of the Weiner Collection.

Specifically, the Forum.

For some reason, the vast majority of Weiner Enthusiasts refuse to contemplate the simple fact that the Forum was by far his most brilliant creation. So, they asked me to gather together as many descendents of the Forum as possible to have them create the aforementioned Tome, in order to enlighten the masses. The huddled, disease-ridden masses.

I've already contributed an article on the Ascendency and Return of office30, but unfortunately my duties as MC will prevent me from writing much more than that. Should the need arise, I think I can tear myself away from the myriad tasks and clean-up associated with my position, but I suspect the most I will be able to do is link everything together as data comes in.

Now, I understand that each of you has a unique view of the Forums as the stories were passed down through the generations, but I hope that you can set them (and the hereditary grudges accociated therewith) aside in order to produce a work that is as factual as possible. Don't let me down!

Current Turn: Free-For-All
Currently Written:
A
Ad Captandum Vulgus
Adobe Creative Suite 4 (CS4) cheap buy online
AHMETxPositronium
Alternate Demises of SMB City
Annexation/Annihilation of Outlandia
Apostasy Trials, The (2051-2052)
App of Wonders, The
Ascendency and Return of office30

B
Banishments of 2005/2025
Battlesketch Games
Batman Incident of 2018, The
Betrayal of Society
Bisexual Counterparts, Operation:
Blogosphere Offensive, The

C
Canadian Panther
Central Nuclear Core
Chason the Obstreperous
Commanding Officers, Saturday Militia
Comittee Members, SMB City

D
Dendrosophy
Department of Redundancy Department, The
Dreadnought

E
Engineer Recruitment
Equal Habitation

F
Fred, the Dangerous

G
General General

S
SMB City

T
The Department of Redundancy Department

Yet to be Written:
Ancient SMB City, Hierarchy of — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)

Battle of Team Fortress — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)

Commanding Officers, Saturday Militia — (forbidden to Cirtur)
Covert Diversion, Operation — (forbidden to Laneth)

Death of General Malaise — (forbidden to Laneth)
Decarnate Brotherhood
Diaspora, First — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)
Duke HawHaw MCCLXXI — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)

Emayle Confirmation Bureau — (forbidden to mountainmage)
Emily Chickenson Restaurants — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)
Epoch Epoch — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)
Equal Habitation — (forbidden to Laneth)

First Integration — (forbidden to Laneth)
Festival Master — (forbidden to Sahan)
Flancer — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)
Forum Patronus — (forbidden to AHMETxRock)
Fraternity of Superheros — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)


Golden Revolution — (forbidden to AHMETxRock)
Great Arctic Wolf — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)

Hostage Crisis of 2049 — (forbidden to Sahan)
House Asherian — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)

Immortal Nine — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous/Sahan)
Implicit Superiority Act — (forbidden to Cirtur)
Interstellar STI Vaccination Act — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)

Kaminski-Weiner-Norimoto Procedure — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)

Lethal Interjection — (forbidden to Laneth)
Levity Group — (forbidden to Cirtur)

Major-General Edprimeminster — (forbidden to Edminster: conflict of interest)
Martholomew the Maleficent — (forbidden to mountainmage)
Martial Government, SMB City — (forbidden to Cirtur)
Mascarpone, Vinnie "the Google" — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)
Meatspace Assault — (forbidden to Sahan)
Money — (forbidden to Cirtur)

New Socialist Movement — (forbidden to Cirtur)
Nuclear Spam Fission — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)

Old Earth — (forbidden to Laneth)
Outlandia Modoral Elections — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)

Phentermine
Postcount++ Formula — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)
Power of Distraction — (forbidden to Laneth)
Project 2Bi — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)

Regulars — (forbidden to Edminster)

Saturday Militia — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)
Second Age — (forbidden to Sahan)
Seers, The — (forbidden to Edminster)
Server Rebalancing — (forbidden to Edminster)
S M B C
SMB Civil War — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)
Spam-Bot — (Claimed by Edminster)
Spam-Bot Augmentation Facility — (forbidden to Sahan)

Temple of Moloch (and his buddy Jesus) — (forbidden to Lethal Interjection)
Thinkoptic Network — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)
Tome of SMBC — (forbidden to Laneth)

Wars of AD 2101 — (forbidden to Cirtur)
Weiner Island — (forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous)

Zach the Magnificent — (forbidden to Sahan)
ZCD (Zach Can't Draw party)

Symposium Request For Information:
Asterisk
Cirtur, Forest Lord of the Brachiatites (forbidden to Cirtur: conflict of interest)
Field Marshal mountainmessiah (forbidden to mountainmage: conflict of interest)
Generaland
Libraria

Moderator Council
Moltemedia
Needlebreed
New Year's Time Paradox of 1969, The
Night of a Thousand Lesbians
Sci-Phi
SMB Civil War, causes of
Spambot Shield
THE STORE
Triumvirate of Order
Wartritia
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Sahan »

Can anyone tell me which article 'Betrayal Of Society' came from?
Destructicus wrote: Alt text:
"I wonder if chemists feel bad that they're always left out of these sorts of jokes."

Since when is chemistry not a science?

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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Edminster »

An article on the Betrayal of Society was directly requested by the Symposium. I believe the request was spawned after learning of the reason that the drunken barrister was ejected from the grounds. It is currently being written by the latecomer by the name of Laneth.
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gödel stop spreading fud

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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

Betrayal of Society, The - written by Laneth, edited by Edminster. Posted for the Symposium's review.
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

Suggestion for easier viewing:

Could we have the Topic Header separated by an EM Dash or something? For Example:
Currently we have this:
App of Wonders, The (forbidden to mountainmage)
Battle of Team Fortress (claimed by TwoCone)
Central Nuclear Core (forbidden to Cirtur)
Death of General Malaise (forbidden to Laneth)

And I'm finding it increasingly harder to read as more articles and "forbidden/claimed" is tallied.

Perhaps we could have:
App of Wonders, The — (forbidden to mountainmage)
Battle of Team Fortress — (claimed by TwoCone)
Central Nuclear Core — (forbidden to Cirtur)
Death of General Malaise — (forbidden to Laneth)

This at least breaks it up a little.
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Edminster »

My apologies for such hasty editing, the night I posted the 'forbidden/claimed' portion I was quite far gone after returning from the Frostbite Fandango.
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gödel stop spreading fud

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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

No apologies necessary and thanks for acquiescing so quickly my request.
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

Do pardon my ignorance and assumption, but should not:
Diaspora be forbidden to Oldrac the Chitinous, not I?

Oldrac was the contributing writer to have inserted this reference, and I have not paid reference to such as yet and cannot see how I can have become restricted from writing such.
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Edminster »

My apologies! It has been fixed. Have you any idea regarding what you shall contribute this week?
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gödel stop spreading fud

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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

I am unsure - Diaspora, though it is not forbidden to me, is not something I'm incredibly familiar with. My research tends to lead me in other directions, away from such technical and geographically-relevant areas. Having never been to or seen such lands that the Diaspora is said to have occurred, I feel I cannot accurately document such events without even a basic knowledge of the terrain and climate of the area, as much as the descendants and my esteemed colleagues could.

If the Symposium has a topic to assign, feel free. Otherwise I will meditate on this and return with a potential topic by the close of day tomorrow, my time.
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Lethal Interjection »

I've tried to glean some understanding of what this Diaspora is supposed to be from the post mentioned, and I have no idea. So I'd prefer off that one as well.

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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Edminster »

While at the Frostbiter Fete, I happened into conversation with an Info-Archaeologist. It turns out that he was in possession of some data that he claims is from the latter half of the Second Age, and I decided to secure it for the benefit of the Project. While I admit that there is the possibility that this is a forgery, it remains impressive nonetheless. From what I can tell, it is a log from the Instantaneous Missive system that was popular back in that time.

Code: Select all

A
Yarr!

B
Hey

A
What be the haps, yo?

B
I think I'm about to get food. You?

A
I was about to grab some orange-flavoured nutritive paste. What kind of paste you headed for?

B
Hrm, I was thinking about crack-flafored, but I think I'm gonna go with cheddar cheese.

A
Are you getting the noodle-textured kind?

B
Nah. That's stuff too expensive for me.

A
At least it takes your mind off the fact that you're eating out of a tube, though.

**Records Corrupted**

B
I guess so.

A
Anyway, just cheese-flavoured nutritive paste? No Soylent-Brand cracker-shaped food substitute?

B
Just the cheese.

A
Man, the Future sucks...

B
Yeah, it really does.
It sucks a little less, after we destroyed all those robots trying to enslave us. But not much less.
Now we have Hitler II running around.
Goddamn him and his super powered, laser shooting mustache.

A
Just wear your mirror suit, and you should be fine. Might get hot and uncomfortable, but so what?
'sbetter than being dead.

B
I dunno...
It does blind all my friends and loved ones.

A
You say that like it's a bad thing.

B
And everytime it breaks, huge shards of glass get lodged in my body.
Which is an inconvenience.

A
Giant shards of silvered glass embedding themselves into flesh builds character.

B
At least modern medicine lived up to future expectations.
Otherwise, I would have died at least 6000 times.

A
I know, right? I mean, titanium replacement bones? Sheer genius, if you ask me.
...
I'm kind of uncomfortable about the nanite replacement for blood, though.

B
Eh, it feels kind of chunky at times, but I've learned to deal.

A
I don't know, man. Sure, it's destroyed any blood-borne diseases that used to exist, but have you heard some of the viruses that these things are susceptible to?

B
Nope.
Other than ultra herpes.

A
Nah, I'm talking about the computer viruses.

B
Well, I've got Norton Anti-virus and it's all up to date.
So I don't really have to worry about it.
And I'm not a trendy douche with mac-nanites.
Once hackers start figuring out those buggers are getting more popular and have next to no protection, all those people. Dead.
...
And I'll be back in a bit, gonna grab something to eat.

A
I'm experimenting with some open-source anti-virals on some lab animals before I start using them on myself. I've just heard so many things about the Norton package and the implantations you need to make it work properly.

B is Away

B
Back.

A
Did you have a filling meal?

B
Sure.

A
That's good.

B
I mean, that isn't the point of meals these days though.

A
I know, it's all about obtaining the minimum nutritional requirement and nothing more.

B
I snuck a little bread paste though too.

A
Way to break the law!

B
Shhhh.
You can't tell.

A
Ah, you've got worse dirt on me, so it's not like I would even chance it.

B
Hrm, that's good.

A
At least not while the Inquisitor-General is on his warpath about unlicensed genetic recombination.

B
Yeah, he's such a douche.

A
I'm not certain what the Immortal Six were thinking when they appointed him.

B
Maybe we should stab them?

A
You go ahead, I enjoy living.

B
We can get away with it somehow?
And I mean, Lethal did get that security job at their building.
So...we have a man on the inside kind of.

A
How would you suggest destroying a cybernetic monstrosity built to destroy all that oppose the Immortals?

**Records Corrupted**

A
Yeah, Laneth said. He also claims that Kangaroo are stalking him.

B
Dude...they are. I saw them.

A
COME ON! You can't seriously believe that!
He's feeding them, that's why they're all around his house.

B
I guess so.
One of them did punch me right in the nose once.
I would about to kick it's ass, you showed up at that point though.

A
Weren't you incredibly drunk off of Laneth's moonshine?

B
Um...I'm gonna say no. Just because.

A
In case the I-G spots it, right?

B
Yeah.
Something like that.

**Record Ends**
ol qwerty bastard wrote:bitcoin is backed by math, and math is intrinsically perfect and logically consistent always

gödel stop spreading fud

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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

My ancestors were known for their excessive drinking, which is I guess why I don't. *shakes head*
This is interesting conversation! I'd love to know their relationship to Lethal and how they figure he's their guy "inside"?
And it also seems there was some civil unrest and dissatisfaction with the way-of-life under the Six and the Inquisitor General...
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Laneth »

I wonder, is the Emayle Confirmation Bureau being written by someone? If not, I'd like to claim it for this round.
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Re: SMBCyclopedia

Post by Lethal Interjection »

Okay, so no one has co-opted me to write anything. Of course the problem is that both E and F have 4 needed entries, and have a topic which should probably go into one of the two. Unless I'm told by tomorrow morning to write something else (if so, I would prefer Equal Habitation), I am going to write my alternate piece.

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