Twilight

We've read at least one, and we'll prove it!
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Kidd
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Twilight

Post by Kidd »

Okay, first off, I need to set up some protection here.

*puts up flame shield*
*puts on gay armor* *

The girl I've been seeing (We'll call her "Taylor", since that's what she likes to be called, apparently) has been begging me to read Twilight.. I met her in the middle and said "How bout this? If Piggly Wiggly ever sells Twilight, I'll buy it and read it." I hate when I make oddly specific conditions. So I was at work Monday, and lo and behold, there was Twilight. I am a man of my word. I bought it, came home after work, and started reading it. The first sixty pages were laughable. Just forced conversation. And it spoon-feeds information to you. The next thing I know, it's 3am, I'm 300 pages in, and I actually am enjoying the book? What the fuck has happened here?

I finished the book, and here's my view on it. If you read the book with the thought (and the back saying "Book of the Decade!") that it's gonna be the greatest literary novel ever, then you will be sorely disappointed. But if you read it, like I did, with a blank mind and reading it just to read, you might be surprised. Is it perfect? Of course not. But it's entertaining, it managed to keep my attention for 450 pages (Something Brisinger couldn't do because Christopher Paolini is a fucking hack), and it has piqued my curiosity enough to find me wanting to read the next book.

So, there you have it, Twilight isn't the book it's hyped up to be, but it isn't as bad as I originally thought, and it definitely is, if nothing else, worth a browse. Now I shall attempt to go find my testicles. I'm pretty sure I left them in page 50; around the 2000th time Bella reminded us of how clumsy and plain she is.







*= Unsurprisingly enough, the gay armor is pink.
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AHMETxRock
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Re: Twilight

Post by AHMETxRock »

oH No. This can't happen. Not now. Not yet. It's too much, too fast. Oh God, it hurts. It hurts. IT HURTS.

NOw that that is out of the way, man, I agree. It is not a very good piece of literature, but it is still decent on some level. It just happens to be the level most people have their brains function on. It's dissappointing that something could get so popular without any true integrity to speak of, and there are so many things that I can criticize about it, but when it's all said and done, it is better than what most critics can think of.
Last edited by AHMETxRock on Fri Dec 26, 2008 4:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Kidd
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Re: Twilight

Post by Kidd »

Yeah, that first part of your post and the picture, that's mainly the reason I don't like you. I'd accuse you of trying too hard to be funny, but those parts don't even make sense.
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Lethal Interjection
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Re: Twilight

Post by Lethal Interjection »

The only thing I like about Twilight is that I get to see Kristen Stewart more often (posters, movie news, etc.).
Also, it is teen lit, and my sister has already been bugging me enough about this. Why? Because I've heard some really good reviews of a book called Paper Towns. When I went to look for it at Chapters, there it was, in the teen lit section. So my sister has subsequently been bugging me about my non-existant fandom of Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants.

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mountainmage
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Re: Twilight

Post by mountainmage »

I'm not above reading teen fiction/fantasy/whatever, but when the main focus of the book IS the romance, I just lose interest. I have no problem with books where there is romance, but when the whole book revolves around it with only minor action or, and here's a big one, plot, then it's not a book I'd like.
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Asherian
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Re: Twilight

Post by Asherian »

I read it, I finished the book. Its not the worst thing I've read.. but I've been in that competition at con, it really lowers your standard. (If you don't know that game/competition its basically a piece of sci-fi that is the most godawful thing ever, the contest is to read it allowed until you just stop. I think the best I've ever seen was 5 sentences.)

It did enrage me though, not for its poor writing, lack of characterization or its many other flaws. For the fact that its encouraging/teaching the idea that stalkers are the best romantic interest. A guy who has violent mood swings, up to and including the fact he fantasizes of killing you, watches you while your sleeping for months while avoiding you and refusing to talk to you. Ignore the age gap of what, 90 years? I know I want a creepy pedophile watching me sleep! Its true love!

Otherwise it was palatable.. but kinda droll. The occasional scene had great imagery but in general it was just so.. flat. Characters were introduced when needed then dropped like a sack of potatoes until they were important for the edward/belle plot. Which was.. difficult? I mean the plot had no real confrontation until near the end, which is then nice and neatly resolved in time for the end, also revealing the little mystery inserted in the book of Alice's backstory!

I'm also really.. annoyed for lack of stronger term at the media trying to insinuate that the issues with the romance/interaction of edward and bella is because the authors mormon. I'm not sure exactly under what basis, mostly because its so off its insulting. Last I checked mormon values weren't pro pedophile stalkers, but hell maybe I'm just out of touch with the church's doctrine.

I feel a bit dirty for owning the book, but a 12 year old made me promise. I handed her 12 good books in return to try and help her grow into real people books.
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mountainmage
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Re: Twilight

Post by mountainmage »

It may be offensive (like everything else there), but I find encyclopediadramatica's description of the series/movies/fans/etc. to be pretty accurate (except when they make stuff up to be funny) from what I've seen and heard about it.
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AHMETxRock
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Re: Twilight

Post by AHMETxRock »

Hey, when he was 17, it was common to marry by then. Also, common, it's only a year till she's allowed to go out in a back alley and sleep with 20 men in the same night, then cry shamelessly about how no one seems to respect her as a person. Is the law really all that important?

Also, Kidd, I agree with you on the point, but I cannot reconcile when your terms are for me to quit being amusing.
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Asherian
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Re: Twilight

Post by Asherian »

Technically when he was 17 being unmarried at that point was semi-scandalous. That somehow makes it better that he's a significantly older creepy stalker with violent fantasies? Good to know! Good to know you also assume all women are whores apparently by the rest of your statement Ahmet, some love life you must be having there.

Does it hurt that you only get to be number 17? Is that why your so angry at her?
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mountainmage
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Re: Twilight

Post by mountainmage »

Ahmet's already told us he has no interest in hugging or anything beyond, so he doesn't have to worry about saying things like that.
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Asherian
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Re: Twilight

Post by Asherian »

Ah my mistake, and here I just assumed it was 'repressed' angst over the girl he liked fucking everyone But him. My apologies, carry on with the conversation.
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Kidd
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Re: Twilight

Post by Kidd »

Asherian wrote:Ah my mistake, and here I just assumed it was 'repressed' angst over the girl he liked fucking everyone But him. My apologies, carry on with the conversation.
No, but close. If I was a modern-day Eunuch, I'd probably resent women (and all things sexual) as well.
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AHMETxRock
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Re: Twilight

Post by AHMETxRock »

I brought up both sides of the whole sexuality issue in the same post.

I'll stop doing that. Instead, I will post one side, then, if and when someone disagrees, I will change sides.

Also, i've gotten rid of the pic, as it has lived long enough.
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Lethal Interjection
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Re: Twilight

Post by Lethal Interjection »

AHMETxRock wrote:Hey, when he was 17, it was common to marry by then. Also, common, it's only a year till she's allowed to go out in a back alley and sleep with 20 men in the same night, then cry shamelessly about how no one seems to respect her as a person. Is the law really all that important?

Also, Kidd, I agree with you on the point, but I cannot reconcile when your terms are for me to quit being amusing.
I had to re-read this post. It is one thing to spell "come on" as "common" every time, but when you start throwing the proper use of "common" into the sentence, that is just confusing.

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Kidd
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Re: Twilight

Post by Kidd »

So I read New Moon (next book in the series) and it did two things for me;

1) I see how blatantly Stephenie Meyers is using Pathos. I mean, every second of every word is emotion-filled literature. To the point where you don't even get a storyline to progress the character's roles, but a storyline to progress their emotions.

2) I fucking hate Stephenie Meyers. If any of you guys were ever wondering how to ruin a novel, try her strategy and completely remove a main character from the book. Edward is nothing more than a footnote in this whole book. And when you think, about it, it doesn't seem like a bad idea to get rid of someone who kinda was bland to begin with, but she replaced him with a werewolf who had the fucking mindset of a puppy, following Bella around trying to get her to see him the way he saw her. It was more than annoying and when Edward finally returned, I was....happy. Ugh. Next book I'll pick up tonight, finish tomorrow.

Is it sad that I'm now powering through 500 page novels in 6 hours just to complete them?
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