The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

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FengharTheNord
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The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by FengharTheNord »

Aight, this is a pretty simple game that I'm sure you guys and gals have seen all around the nets. It's a choose your own adventure MS Paint story- except you don't choose the adventure. I do. You guys just suggest the adventure.

Exciting!

Anyways the rules are:

1. Suggest something.
2. Don't cheat

So yeah, suggest any action at all. If you want it to be picked make sure it's relevant and progresses the story. Also, make sure that you are suggesting an action for the character to attempt, rather than an action happening to the character or an outcome. This all goes under the "don't cheat" rule, but I figured I should be a bit more explicit.

Here we go!
Narrator wrote:Once upon a time, there was this sorta stupid looking spider thing that lived in this, like, hole.
Image

Okay, go. I'm gonna go nice and slow with this so I don't go crazy drawing 5 panels per action like I normally do.
Narrator and Lord Retard wrote: One day the stupid little spider thing decided it was high time he double-checked his paperwork as he didn't want to be found with his W-2's missing their partner X-409's. Everything seemed to check out.
Image
Narrator wrote: But then the stupid little spider thing, in his utmost stupidness, slowly realized that he didn't know how to read, and he didn't own a stereotypical green accountant visor.
Image
Narrator and Mountainmage wrote: The stupid little spider, fed up with his lack of a blackjack/accountant visor, got a stupid little idea. He decided that he was going to finally leave the hole. This was surely a momentous occasion in this little twerp's stupid and pitiful life, even if it was only to peek out and survey his surroundings. What the spider-thing found was not a glorious green landfill full of discarded blackjack/accountant visors, but a thick fog stretching as far as his retarded non-spider like eyes could see.
Image
Narrator and Edminster wrote: Eventually, and by eventually I mean 2 hours later, the shock of no visors finally sunk in and the stupid spider thing's pea brain, unable to handle such a massive load of information, subsequently broke. The spider thing found himself giving into his existential angst caused by a green visor-less world.
Image
Narrator wrote: And then, to top off his stupidity, he fell
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Narrator wrote:Really
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Narrator wrote:Really
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Narrator wrote:Far
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Narrator wrote:But before I can tell you that story, I must tell you this story
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Narrator wrote:About a man who is currently being LAZY and SLEEPING when he should be ON HIS SHIFT!
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Narrator and Ahmet and Edminster wrote:And so the man, having slept for at least 3 hours, wakes up and does what every man naturally does when he wakes up.
He says hello to his morningwood, his beautiful sword that was passed down to him by his father.
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Narrator and MoutainMage wrote:The man had the tummy grumblies and he knew the cure. He made breakfast, which consisted of yellow and mush.
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Narrator wrote:He finished it all up and stared at the lovely image imprinted on his favorite plate.
Image
Narrator and MoutainMage wrote:Just then a a breeze blew in. Winter's dying breath reached through his home and punched him in the nads. It was then that his brain reminded him to put some clothes on already! So he went to his very full wardrobe and opened it up...
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Narrator wrote:...revealing a very empty wardrobe, save for his gloves, a note, and a wire hanger.
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Narrator wrote:Now I don't exactly know how to read but I imagine, because of how the rest of this story goes, that the note read something like this...
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Narrator wrote:And thusly, after having read the note probably around 4-9 times, the man was left confused, bewildered, perplexed, and naked.
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Narrator and Ahmet wrote:But the man, though affected by many statuses that would cripple any lesser being, was unbalked by this turn of events. He was a quick thinker, and knew just the thing to cure his nudity! Fashioning a cape out of his blanket!
Image
Narrator and MountainMage wrote:Soon, though, the man realized that, though pleasing, a cape-blanket was not exactly ideal for protecting one's genitals from the shriveling breezes that so often blow through these lands, so he started out his door to see if there were any clothes outside, but what he was met with was not clothes but...
Image
Narrator wrote:...A peaceful creature, reminiscent of your world's rhinos, excluding their tumultuous temper...
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Narrator wrote:...A peaceful creature, reminiscent of your world's rhinos, INcluding their tumultuous temper...
Fix'd

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Narrator wrote:And now the beast is raring to charge, what ever shall our hero do!?
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Last edited by FengharTheNord on Wed May 20, 2009 11:22 pm, edited 12 times in total.
DonRetrasado wrote:
Amerika wrote:
DonRetrasado wrote:Well you'd need a sock as big as an airplane to hide my penis. An airplane the size of the universe.
Wait I live in a universe.
bow chicka bow wow

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Edminster
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by Edminster »

>Wake up

ALTERNATELY!

>Stay asleep
ol qwerty bastard wrote:bitcoin is backed by math, and math is intrinsically perfect and logically consistent always

gödel stop spreading fud

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LordRetard
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by LordRetard »

I want the Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing to double-check his paperwork.

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FengharTheNord
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by FengharTheNord »

He double-checked it.
DonRetrasado wrote:
Amerika wrote:
DonRetrasado wrote:Well you'd need a sock as big as an airplane to hide my penis. An airplane the size of the universe.
Wait I live in a universe.
bow chicka bow wow

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Oldrac the Chitinous
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by Oldrac the Chitinous »

Now the spiderdude needs to steal a visor from a blackjack dealer.
Police said they spent some time working out if they could charge the man with being armed with a weapon, as technically he was armed with part of a fish.

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Edminster
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by Edminster »

So, we're not doing this where you only edit the results into the OP after the entire thing is completed? In that case I'm going to have to pass because this will get mighty confusing for my itty-bitty brain.
ol qwerty bastard wrote:bitcoin is backed by math, and math is intrinsically perfect and logically consistent always

gödel stop spreading fud

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FengharTheNord
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by FengharTheNord »

Oldrac the Chitinous wrote:Now the spiderdude needs to steal a visor from a blackjack dealer.
Ack, that's what it is!
DonRetrasado wrote:
Amerika wrote:
DonRetrasado wrote:Well you'd need a sock as big as an airplane to hide my penis. An airplane the size of the universe.
Wait I live in a universe.
bow chicka bow wow

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Oldrac the Chitinous
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by Oldrac the Chitinous »

I think they both have those visors. I don't know why.
Police said they spent some time working out if they could charge the man with being armed with a weapon, as technically he was armed with part of a fish.

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FengharTheNord
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by FengharTheNord »

Ok, I was worried because I could not figure out where I was drawing that image from and had a small, sneaking suspicion that it was indeed not a financial desk-fellow that wore the visor, but some other, more suave profession. Now I figure that I'm a-ok if other people are mildly confused too.
DonRetrasado wrote:
Amerika wrote:
DonRetrasado wrote:Well you'd need a sock as big as an airplane to hide my penis. An airplane the size of the universe.
Wait I live in a universe.
bow chicka bow wow

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ruotwocone
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by ruotwocone »

Oldrac the Chitinous wrote:Now the spiderdude needs to steal a visor from a blackjack dealer.
seconded. all in favor... all opposed... the ayes have it.

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mountainmage
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by mountainmage »

Peep out the hole and survey your surroundings.
No more white horses ♬ ♫ ♪ ılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılı ♪ ♫ ♬ for you to ride away

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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by AHMETxRock »

Have mid-life crisis.
Just like an std, will never fully go away.

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FengharTheNord
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by FengharTheNord »

Nice and slow, nice and sloooow.
DonRetrasado wrote:
Amerika wrote:
DonRetrasado wrote:Well you'd need a sock as big as an airplane to hide my penis. An airplane the size of the universe.
Wait I live in a universe.
bow chicka bow wow

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Cirtur
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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by Cirtur »

Little lower, little slower.

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Re: The Itsy Bitsy Spider-Thing

Post by ruotwocone »

AHMETxRock wrote:Have mid-life crisis.
actually lol'd on this - a first for me on ahmet's posts. quality

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